Dallas matchmaking service breaks down some helpful rules for dating someone who suffers from insecurities.
No matter if your current partner is damaged from their previous relationship or lacking self-esteem due to their own physical or emotional insecurities, it’s not uncommon for someone to lose their confidence. Most people are able to put a bad experience behind them, but some men and women carry those suitcases full of heavy baggage, not allowing them to move on—hurting their self-esteem and their dating success.
If you are currently dating someone who is insecure, then you know how challenging it can be to have a relationship with them. Dallas matchmaking experts don’t want you to give up so they have put together some helpful do’s and don’ts when it comes to dating someone who suffers from insecurities.
Give Them Sincere Compliments
Compliments are a great way for boosting your partner’s self-esteem. If your partner has taken time to dress up, don’t be afraid to let them know you noticed. Compliments should be sincere and meaningful; you don’t want to give the same compliment time after time. Compliment them on their sense of style, their unique features and personality traits. And although this is not your reason behind doing it, doing so will probably get you a few compliments in return.
Don’t Go Over the Top with the Compliments
Giving the same compliment to your partner day in and day out can quickly lose its meaning. While it’s nice to extend a compliment, you don’t want to overdo it. There is no need to give them a compliment every hour; instead, they should be spread out and meaningful, explains Dallas matchmaking experts. If not, you will find the compliments you’re extending will be unappreciated or perceived as fake.
Respect the Boundaries
If your partner is insecure, they most likely have set some boundaries for the relationship—maybe keeping the light on is out the window, maybe taking a shower together is out the window, or maybe they don’t feel comfortable with PDA’s—whatever the boundaries might be, it’s important you respect them throughout the course of your relationship. Once the two of you are comfortable with each other, maybe then they can decrease the boundaries.
Don’t Add More Problems
Someone who suffers from insecurities is already facing many problems and you want to make sure you don’t add anymore to their plate. Always avoid putting them down, questioning their thoughts or opinions, or interrupting them when they’re talking—doing so will make them feel even less of a person than they already feel they are. And if you argue, avoid insulting them below the belt—be respectful of their feelings all the time, reminds Dallas matchmaking experts.
Always Help Them
Aside from giving them compliments and avoiding insulting them, you also want to help your partner become more secure. Show them your love and interest by always listening to what they have to say—let your partner vent to you. With the right amount of listening and genuine caring, you’ll find your partner will eventually come around.
Don’t Blame Yourself for Their Insecurities
It’s more likely your partner’s insecurity problems come from somewhere else—it is important you don’t start pointing the finger at yourself. This will only make the problem worse and your partner will start to sense it, which will then trigger a circle of self-blame, explains Dallas matchmaking experts. Realize and understand their insecurities have nothing to do with you.
Do Nice Things for Them
In any relationship, random acts of kindness are appreciated, but they can go even further when dating someone who is insecure. Leave her a dozen roses, leave him a loving note, buy your partner something which expresses your love for them. These unexpected acts of kindness will go a long way of reinforcing your love for them, and with time, their insecurities will melt away.
Don’t Flirt With Other People
Sure, everyone finds someone of the opposite sex attractive besides our partners, and some people are flirty by nature; however, when you date someone who is insecure, their confidence is lower than normal and you don’t want to make it worse by flirting at others. Don’t stare at the most attractive person at the bar or flirt with the wait staff—do the best to show your partner you only have eyes for them.
Decide How Long You’re Willing to Put Up with It
Dating someone who suffers from insecurities can be a tough path to follow. Before you decide to give yourself 100% to the relationship, you need to figure out how much you’re willing to put up with their insecurities. If you are unsure, you need to break things off right now because the truth is, they may never come around—especially if you don’t put in efforts to make them feel more secure.
Don’t Keep Your Relationship on the Down-Low
It is rude for one partner to keep their partner hidden from friends and family. When you are dating someone who suffers from insecurity problems you’ll want to show them how happy and proud you are of having them as a partner, explains Dallas matchmaking experts. To do this, don’t shy away from telling others you’re dating someone new. By sharing to those close to you that you’re dating your new partner, your partner will be able to feel secure in the relationship. Keeping things hidden will make their insecurities worse.
Be Prepared for it to Take Time
In the right relationship with the right partner, someone who is insecure will come around slowly. You need to understand that the change is not going to happen overnight, it can take months and months of hard work in order to make you relationship successful, explains Dallas matchmaking experts. If you are starting to follow the above advice, you’ll notice your partner is coming around slowly. When this happens, keep going and take pride in your relationship—and take pride in the relationship that you’re lifting your partner up and making them feel more secure in themselves and the relationship you have together.